Skip to main content

Day 41: I forgive myself for any way in which I have obstructed my own happiness and potential

Intention of the day: Forgive myself, today and everyday. Mistakes will always be made, that's how life works. No more beating myself up for it.

Morning writing: I've always thought of myself as a self-sabotager. I obviously never do it intentionally, but it seems to happen a lot. I don't pick my battles when I'm in a relationship, and find myself in trouble a lot. I could have gone to a cheaper state school and saved myself thousands in student loans. There are plenty of things I could (and maybe should) have done differently each day. But that's how life works I suppose. There's no point in berating myself over every little thing. Spend that energy on something that will benefit my life instead.

Tarot Past/Present/Future:

IV The Emperor (authority figure, father figure, structure, solid foundation)
XIX The Sun (fun, warmth, success, positivity, vitality)
VII The Chariot (control, willpower, victory, assertion, determination)

I simply begged for hope and asked will today be a better day. Seems that if I use the solid foundation that I already have, and have confidence in my abilities that I know that I have, I can find success and stay the course. Now is not the time to cower and be afraid. Yes, I fell last week and hurt myself. I must soldier on and use my fire within to light the way.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 62: I release the world from my control

Intention of the day: Meditate on releasing my need to be in control. Trust that things will all be taken care of by the Universe. Morning writing: I had a nice long meditation in my morning routine today. It's Friday and my boss is out for a vacay so if I'm a little late it's not a big deal. Besides, things will all be taken care of by the Universe! I have had control issues for a while. Insecurity makes you want to try to control everything that you can, as a defense mechanism. You think that if you control how people act or where they go, then they will act and do whatever you want and you will not get hurt. This is unhealthy and simply not possible. I can't control anything except for myself, my actions, and my reactions. My relationship with my ex was toxic because I wanted to control him. I wanted him to be the perfect version of himself that was inside my head. But that person isn't real and the real guy didn't want to be that perfect self, for whatever...
Post a Comment
Read more

Day 108: I am the One who is experiencing itself as all of creation

Intention of the day: Always remember that I am made of the same divine light as the rest of the Universe. We are all of one, and one is within us all. Morning writing: I made it! The book is complete. This is the final lesson. It's a bit of a reiteration of some previous lessons but still a good one to end on. Remember that I am made of the same energy as other people. As the trees and animals, and inanimate objects too. This planet is made of atoms just like I am. This Universe is composed of atoms. If you zoom out far enough... this Universe looks like an atom. We are all the same oneness, energy and light. It is always moving and changing as it works to stay in balance. That is the yin and yang of this energy, the magnetism of it. There will always be bad with good, that's part of the balance. Without motion there is no life. So now the book is over. I am not sure if this blog will continue as frequently, we'll just see how that goes. I will try to check in, but I m...
Post a Comment
Read more

Day 10: I invite myself to fully experience everything I feel

Intention of the day: Let my body be my sanctuary where I can regain my strength and feel grounded. Let my emotions be real but not control my entire self and not affect my entire day. Morning writing: This one is difficult for me. I get emotional very easily. I treat this with my self-medication to help me keep my cool. But as evidenced by the existence of this blog, I'm still not entirely "together." I understand what the book is TRYING to say, but I think I already feel all my emotions pretty well. So I delved deeper into the secondary message of today's ritual: my body is my rock. My body is a constant, silent warrior where my crazy head sits on top. If I need to get out of a bad head space or calm my incessant inner monologue, I can use my new meditation techniques to regain my strength and composure. The bigger issue is acknowledging when my thoughts are becoming toxic, and being cognizant of the tools I have to change my tune.
Post a Comment
Read more